At some point in the life of a blogger, the question arises:  Why?  What's the point of all of this, anyway?  Isn't this a colossal effort for nothing, really?

For me, the answer has ebbed and flowed to become something altogether different over time.  I started at first to invest into that component of myself who is a writer.  My husband had been reading a book that said, essentially, that what separates the good from the best in life (in whatever field of endeavor) was about 10,000 hours of practise.  I determined then to begin my 10,000 hours and so Joy Is So Yellow was born.

I found that - like most things in life - there is a steep learning curve to be climbed.  I go through periods of hating my blog and seriously considering shutting the whole thing down.  There have been times when it felt a lot more like work and smacked far less of joy.  In those early days, I was loathe to hit the 'publish live' button because I felt I could never be sure the post was quite perfect.  Now, I begin to grasp that though these posts are far from that evasive, idyllic state, the perfection part isn't the point.  For me, what blogging has mostly done is to help me come to define myself inside my own head as a writer.  Writers write, right?  And how on earth does one ever cast off the mantle of unpublished without these long, dry early days?  I see that I'm wise not to resent these days but instead, to view them as an investment into the Self I hope to grow into being.

I've grown to love the little community that gathers around me here.  I'm touched and humbled by the fact that these (for the most part) mysterious people continue to read.  The fact that what I've got to say somehow means something to anyone other than my egocentric old self is surprising and lovely and bolstering.

P.S.  Can you believe the audacity of me, putting a picture of Jane Austin up to accompany this entry?  Me and Jane - we're pretty tight.

04/06/2011 6:12pm

I hope you don't ever shut it down. If you never get published (which I hope you do) it would be a shame for you to think that this is all for naught. I think your words bring joy and encouragement to people's lives. At least they do for me. I think you are an extremely insightful, deep person, and I look foreword to reading your thoughts when I have the time. You encourage me more than you know. I think your followers could agree. I want to become a better person just from reading your blog and I miss my old friend that I used to know and laugh with so often. I feel like I've reconnected with that friend again. maybe this blog isn't just about You. It's about you affecting an audience, providing depth, encouragement, wisdom, hope, refreshment to people when they need a little inspiration. i hope you know, when I grow up, I want to be just like you!

04/07/2011 2:05pm

Long ago I read a quote that said the flutter of a butterfly's wings has the power to affect a change in winds across the sea.

Whether or not it's metaphor, your writing is like the butterfly; it may be that you need to write to move forward, just as the butterfly must beat its wings to fly.

I've had a similar situation today (how timely), where I thought, 'what am I doing? what's the point of this?' (while wishing I could take back what I'd already done to make it better).
And then I realized I'm just doing what I do. Because it makes me think and feel and connect and laugh.

Keep going yellow joy! Go GO go.

04/12/2011 12:33pm

I too, have had many moments of "I quit." Your insights are valuable. Thanks for bringing Joy Is So Yellow to cyberspace for the rest of us to come along for the journey. [And,besides, as my Dad would say, when you are rich and famous, we can all say we knew you, when you were good for nothing!"]

01/27/2012 6:23pm

will come back soon

01/28/2012 5:47am

good post

03/23/2012 12:43pm

Many thanks for details

03/23/2012 8:22pm

Good info bro

03/30/2012 1:05am

will be restored quickly

06/13/2012 12:59am

nice post


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